Many strive to discover the secret to a happy relationship, and the answer is more complicated than just one be-all-end-all! Here’s how psychologists explain four things that make a relationship work.

BE YOUR PEOPLE

When you’ve been with someone for a very long time, it’s easy to slip into a state where you don’t do anything without the other. You become almost interchangeable and, in the worst-case scenario, could get codependent. This is very unhealthy because the common idea that a partnership is two halves making a whole is not accurate. A partnership is two whole people coming together out of love and appreciation. Your entire life shouldn’t be about your partner, and you shouldn’t be relying on them to give you everything you need. That’s too much pressure for anyone, and it’s blatantly unfair to yourself, too. Give each other space, assess yourself and grow on your own, have separate friends, and take care of yourself.

POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT

Reinforcement is the act of continuing to make it clear that you love and appreciate your partner. It’s easy to accidentally fall out of the habit of being sweet and romantic to someone you’ve been in a relationship with for years and years. But leaving the honeymoon phase doesn’t mean the sweetness should end. If anything, you need to continue working on your relationship forever, and you shouldn’t become complacent in the way you show your affection. Here are some ways to make sure positive reinforcement is still a part of your relationship: Encourage and support your partner, surprise your partner now and then schedule a date night hold hands in public and keep romance alive.

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COMMUNICATION CAN MAKE A RELATIONSHIP WORK

There’s a reason that so many people say communication is the secret to a happy relationship. No human being can read minds, so you need to talk to your partner about different concerns you have or opinions you hold. Share your downs, don’t make assumptions and talk about boundaries.

POSITIVE THINKING HELPS MAKE A RELATIONSHIP WORK

Positive thinking is a powerful thing, capable of completely changing your perception of any given situation. It’s also something you need to have if you want to keep a relationship healthy. This has to be a mutual choice between both partners in the relationship. Both of you have to decide to control how you carry yourselves to promote more positive behavior and manage moods together as a team.

Have you tried the tips above?

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