If you’ve never felt comfortable with traditional punishments for your child, then positive discipline might be the type of discipline you want to try. Here are four positive discipline strategies you can incorporate into your parenting strategies.

1 Use Single-Word Reminders

Rather than making demands on your child (Stop running! Put your coat away! Share the toy!) say one word in a casual tone: Walk. Coat. Share. With this gentle reminder, she won’t get defensive but rather remember what the proper behavior is.

2 Use Time-In, Not Time-Out

Time-out can be an effective consequence, but it’s often overused. Placing a child in repeat time-outs may backfire and cause him to act out even more in an attempt to gain your attention and affection. When your child misbehaves, sit down with him to read a book rather than sending him to time-out alone. Continue this until your child has calmed down and, if appropriate, is ready to apologize for his behavior.

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3 Positive Reinforcement

Praise your child’s good behavior. If your child shares a toy with a friend or sibling, tell her how generous she is.1 If your child extends kindness to someone else, point out what a great job she did. This gives her positive attention for what she’s done right, rather than reinforced the things she did that are against the rules. When your child does break the rules, explain how she can make a better choice in the future.

4 Redirection

Little ones have a short attention span, so it’s not too difficult to redirect them to another activity when they’re acting out. If your toddler is playing with an object that could be dangerous, introduce another toy that will grab his attention. If that doesn’t work, take him to another room or go outside to divert his attention. Tell an older child what he can do, rather than what he can’t. So rather than tell him he can’t watch TV anymore, tell him he can go outside to play or he can work on a puzzle. Staying focused on the positive can reduce a lot of arguments and defiant behavior.

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